Thursday, July 30, 2009

Weather propaganda

So the weather witch doctors, oh sorry, "meteorologists", say we are in a "cooling trend". It's only going to get up to 100 today. Yesterday was 106. A "cooling trend"? Give to me a break.

And "meteorologist"? I mean, "the study of meteors" does not fit their job description except for those rare occasions when they tell you about METEOR showers, another misnomer. They should be meteor fallings, because that's what they are doing, or rather hurtling from space at the earth. I'm sure it wouldn't be politically correct to call them meteor droppings right? But I digress.

I think the "meteorologists" should be called "Meter-ologists", because really that's all they are doing. They read thermoMETERS, and baroMETERS, and radar-oMETERS and all kinds of other METERS and basically reading computer generated reports. Do they actually launch weather balloons or launch weather satellites or leave their spiffy greenscreens at all?

You know why we watch weather people? Heck if I know. Maybe it's because we actually see their legs. Those other people on the news could be talking animatronics on tripods for all we can see. And the weather people have such nice outfits. And they never wear shorts or cutoffs in 100 degree heat and you never see them sweat.

And I'm feeling a tad woozy, so I'll just go dunk my head in a bucket of ice water now.

3 comments:

Nicole's crazy Blog said...

Oh you poor dear! I do not miss the heat. At all. But it could be a tad warmer than our 55 here today. Oh well. I would go for the apartment pool or the peep hole in the fridge. is you little cub scout about dying out at camp all day? Hang in there!

Sarah Bishop Jackson said...

I am so sorry you are having so much heat. I know it isn't fun.

T&JCrawford said...

Ok, I need permission to access your blog with my students. You are too funny. When are you going to write some magazine articles or books!?!?!